Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Who's afraid of the big, bad. . . scale?

Almost all women share a universal fear of the bathroom scale. The numbers on a scale can turn intelligent, sane women into irrational, crazy ladies. Men, I can’t speak for you, but I imagine that some of you are tortured by that little rectangular demon as well.

It doesn’t matter if the world thinks you look great. There is a number in your head that you want to weigh. That’s your “magic” number, or maybe you call it your “feel good” weight. When you see “it” in digital numbers, staring up at you, the angels will sing and you will skip through the day, light as air, like nothing in the world can bring you down. It’s true.

So what’s your number? I know you’re thinking of it. And if it makes you smile, then you might be “there" right now. If you’re frowning to yourself, well, I know that you’re beating your self up, right at this moment, for that hand full of Kettle Chips you had this afternoon while standing in the pantry.

I personally hate the scale and the power it holds over me. All of us in our right minds know that our weight can fluctuate fairly significantly through the course of a week. But that doesn’t stop us from seeing “the number” and letting it ruin a perfectly fine day. Which is why I decided quite a long while ago, to throw the awful thing deep into my closet and only take it out when I am certain I will like what it says.

I told my friend once that the key is to step on the scale after a good stomach flu – or seriously terrible hangover. Look down and see that wonderfully low, dehydrated number. . . burn it in to your memory and decide that is what you will weigh until you’re dumb enough to step on the dang thing again!

I am ignorance is bliss kind of girl. I don’t need to know I gained 2 pounds. I really don’t. You can’t even see 2 pounds on a body. So, I have found something that works far better than a scale for keeping my weight in check. I try on jeans. Yes, it’s as simple as that. We all have the pair of jeans in our closet that are a bit tighter than the rest of the pile. That pair is my “scale.” Currently they are a pair that I don’t even wear any more (when I can, that is) because I’ve had them so long.

I wake up in the morning – not all mornings mind you. Just mornings when I am feeling like I’ve been eating like crap all week and hoping it hasn’t caught up to me yet. I walk straight to my closet and put on my scale jeans. Sometimes I am pleasantly surprised. Sometimes I peel them off in disgust and vow to do better this week. But either way I don’t see the little fluctuations in my weight. I don’t need to. They tell me all I need to know about the size of my body. And remember, it’s the number that makes us so crazy.

So, find those little jeans in your closet. You know which ones. Dub them your “new scale.” They won’t be completely forgiving, but they won’t spit ugly numbers at you in blaring red, neon lights either.

4 comments:

  1. I have to admit that I have to weigh myself every morning. Even when I know I am not going to like what I see. I feel that it helps keep me in check. I know that I don't see a difference with a 2 pound increase but when it gets to be 4 or 5 pounds I definitely know I need to get it together. It's a reality check. I can't let it get away from me.

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  2. I have two pairs of jeans that I use as my scale. Currently, neither one will fit over my hips. I have them on a hanger, hanging on my closet door so that I have to look at them every time I go into my bathroom. I have a scale too, but I honestly don't care what the scale says. It's the jeans that are screaming at me...

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  3. I totally agree with Lori. Who cares what the number is...what really matters is how the clothes fit. I very rarely get on a scale. Does that mean I'm afraid? Maybe, but I still think how the jeans fit is way more important than the number on the scale. If the number looks good and the jeans don't, what good is it?

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  4. scales are evil wicked creations. the only reason you should step on a scale is if the wod calls for your bodyweight on a barbell or you have a weight class competition. besides that who needs a scale? just pay attention to how hard the pullups are in your warm up. :)i had to change the way i thought about the number on the scale when i started trying to put on some lean mass. it was kind of a mind @#$!. maybe i should try skinny jeans....but manly skinny jeans....

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